Hey moms! I have a small story of encouragement in faith and motherhood for you today.
The Search for Community
In the last few months, my husband and I finally found a church that we wanted to settle into and call home for our family. That process and decision could be a post all on its own, but for another day.
It was very important to us to have a community that we could join for more actual life-doing than just attending the same service on Sunday morning. With that value front and center in our minds, we visited our church on Wednesday night pretty early on.
Wednesday Nights in Community
Here, Wednesday night church groups are known as gospel communities. The mission of the church is to create gospel-centered disciple-making families. On Wednesday, several family units ranging from college students to married couples with children to individuals who are grandparents now meet in a home. It’s a beautiful mixture of all walks of life. Our children are always welcome and are intentionally included.
These nights start with worship. The children join the adults and we sing through a hymn and pray as a collective group. Then the children head to a different place with adult leaders to cover the same lesson as the adults, but at their comprehension level. Inside, the adults will cover a group of verses that address the weekly catechism. We read them out loud together and then discuss it at great lengths together. We answer questions about what it is saying, how it applies to our walks as Christians and so on. After we study scripture, we break into smaller groups for some time in prayer.
When we were new, it was tempting to let the prayer portion of the evening feel a bit awkward. I suppose this was because the groups tend to be different each time we gather, and it just felt so vulnerable. However, it didn’t take long at all to get to know the hearts of the people we were worshiping next to and to see the Lord working in so many different ways for so many people.
It really is amazing to recount the prayers we have been invited into and seen work out. We’ve seen small requests and out right miracles be answered. It has grown my faith so much in only a few short months. I would like to add that I didn’t necessarily consider my faith weak before we started attending this church. I just think that I failed to consider how life-giving community and prayer really were. It’s funny that I discounted it so much because those happen to be the very things that led us to keep looking for a community to belong in.
Faith in Our Family
Our two boys recently made the decision to be baptized. There is so much to say about this, but for today I will tell you that our church leadership celebrated to great lengths with us and then in the very next breath linked arms with my husband and I in order to equip us to continue to lead and model a life of following Christ to the kids. I loved that their baptisms were treated as a jumping off point rather than a finish line. For some reason, I feel the attitude surrounding baptism in various places in my past experiences seemed to view it as the latter.
Our pastor is faithful to repeat that while eternal life is gained by making the choice to accept Christ’s gift of salvation, there is so much of His gift we experience this side of Heaven as we walk with Him. Actively seeking Him. Daily surrendering to His plans. Enjoying a real relationship with Him.
I know this. I live it. However, the task of faithfully modeling this for my kids really has me catching myself deep in thought hoping I don’t mess this up. I want to be sure they are grasping what it means to know Christ deeply and seek him daily. I want them to learn what it means to really know and love Him. It’s convicting in all the best ways.
Meaningful Examples
Suddenly, how I steward my money has more meaning because they are watching. The way I speak to myself carries more weight because they are watching. The way I respond to disappointment, how I serve my family, the way I care for my body and so many other things are so much more important since they made this decision. I suppose it’s hit me that they are now learning to approach their life by looking through the same lens I claim to have adopted for my own life. Am I doing it faithfully with wholehearted diligence? Or am I doing that only when it’s comfortable and convenient?
Now, I’m not saying it hasn’t always been important. I’m also not saying that I say one thing and do another. I’m just so much more aware that they are looking at my life now as a way to follow Christ rather than just knowing that I know Him. It packs a punch.
Making Intentional Habits
This got me to start thinking about prayer and how I model it to the kids. One night I brought my thoughts to my husband. We pray together all the time. I pray individually all the time. I pray with the kids when we pass a first responder hurrying to a job or when they wake in the middle of the night in fear of a nightmare. But I don’t model well the daily seeking out time to bring my heart to the feet of Jesus in front of them outside of Bible study with homeschool curriculum.
We decided a good way to start this would be to mimic what our gospel community does every Wednesday. Keep it simple. Share our hearts one at a time and then take turns praying over each other. So, we added this to what we talk about at the dinner table. Now in between funny stories from our days or requests for more ketchup, we ask each kid to share what is on their heart, good or bad. We ask how we can pray for them that day. The first few times we did this it was very generic.
“Pray for Nana and my bad dreams.”
We thank them for sharing and then decide which other family member would pray over the request.
After a few nights, the requests started to become much more real-time. They have started sharing things they relate to in the moment or deeper thoughts they have mulled over.
Watching a Prayer Answered
This is where that nugget of encouragement I have for you comes in.
Last night, when it was my oldest son’s turn we asked him our question. “Coleman, how can we pray for you today?” He thought for a moment and then responded, “Ask the Lord to help our family make good decisions. Ask Him to lead us to do that and if we try to make a bad decision, help us change our mind.” My husband and I kind of looked at each other, seeming to both be thinking it was a bit random but pretty adorable.
We prayed for that and then moved on to the next person.
This afternoon lunch time rolled around, and we were behind schedule. I was flustered trying to make sure all the homeschool lessons were completed, and the laundry was changed. I needed to get to the part of the day where I got several chores done. I decided that since I had no real plan for lunch worked out yet, I would just go grab lunch.
The kids grabbed their shoes, and I readied myself as quickly as possible. I knew that this outing wasn’t really in our budget, so I made plans to grab something cheap. It was also pretty obvious that something was likely a pizza from Little Caesar’s. I felt the conviction of knowing that the kids and I don’t do well with gluten but justified it as one of the “occasional” times it was ok. I completely ignored the feeling in my gut that felt a little hypocritical.
We drove off. At the entrance of our neighborhood, we saw that there was a ton of traffic backed up that would make exiting difficult. I decided I had no time for that. It was already a really late lunch anyway. I turned down a side street of the neighborhood and made my way home explaining to the kids that it just wasn’t worth the time to fight the crowd on the highway. I would just get creative at home.
As I was unloading my kids from the car, my mind wandered back to the prayer request Coleman presented to our family just last night. I couldn’t help but smile because it had just been answered. I cooked real food that actually nourished us and didn’t spend a dime outside of our budget to do so. As we sat there, I asked the kids if they remembered what Coleman asked us to pray for the night before. As they recounted the details, I talked them through how the Lord had just answered it. You should have seen their faces as it all came back, and they wrapped their heads around how it applied to our afternoon.
My Encouragement to You
I know it might be easy to pass off my decision to turn around as laziness or impatience. It really was very uncharacteristic of me.
Regardless of how you view the decision I made, the point I want to make is this. If we don’t pray, we don’t see prayers answered. Likewise, if we don’t watch for and acknowledge the answers, we miss them. Neither of those things builds our faith. If we miss the chance to show this to our children, prayer will remain an elusive thing that may or may not carry any validity to them.
It doesn’t have to be fancy or complicated. It doesn’t have to take a long time. The prayers with your children can happen around the dinner table surrounded by chatter about sports, instructions about not burping at the table and requests for more ketchup. This is real life and prayer is made for that. I hope this leaves you encouraged to invite your children into regular prayer so they can build their faith.
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